The kids started school this week.
I had to take my oldest for his 12 year physical at the doctors office last week.
While were waiting there was a woman waiting with her precious, two week old baby boy.
And I couldn't help but think back twelve years ago to when I was taking my darling
first baby in for his newborn check up.
Oh, all the things I wanted to say to this cute new mother who was looking at her baby so adoringly.
Breathe in that newborn smell often. Just drink it in, close your eyes and savor it.
Don't be in a rush for him to crawl, walk or hit any other milestone.
Enjoy each phase while it lasts.
Let him learn by playing, even though he will sometimes fall and get hurt.
Stay close by but don't hover, he needs to learn how to figure it out himself.
Kiss him every day and tell him that you love him especially when you are angry with him.
Watch him sleep.
They grow up so fast.
I didn't say any of this to her, but I wanted to.
I know it's cliche and every mother says this, but that's because we are mourning the loss
of little puckered lips making sucking motions in sleep.
Slobbery open mouthed kisses.
Squishy, slippery little bare bottoms that you just have to pinch after each bath.
And chubby little arms that can wrap around your neck and squeeze just so tight.
Before you know it that sweet tiny baby will be listening to rock music,
stealing your husbands socks and quoting Monty Python.
It happens so incredibly fast.
And speaking of growing fast check out these shoes!
Yes, you read that right, my nine year old is wearing men's shoe sizes
MY NINE YEAR OLD IS WEARING MENS SHOE SIZES! GAH!
He's not the only one, but holy moley I thought we'd have a little more time before that.
Now lets talk about this
Wow that is one cute kid!
He started first grade today which means that my baby is now in school full time.
I have been dreading this day for at least two years now.
And it was just as awful as I had anticipated.
He was fine and happy, standing in line talking to his friends about their new
backpacks and what was in their lunch boxes.
It's a good thing because if he was sad and didn't want to go I may have taken him home with me and brewed up a potion that kept him six years old forever.
It's me that was a wreck.
I wore my sunglasses so he didn't notice my watery puffy eyes,
and I was able to make it to the car until I completely burst into tears.
And burst I did.
When I sent this kid off to school 8 years ago it was hard.
This is my oldest when he was six.
But I was so excited for him, that it made me happy.
And I was a little overwhelmed with my other two and soon to be three young'uns with me at home.
So I shed a few happy tears watching him walk into his classroom with his teacher.
Today there were only sad tears.
I was not crying for him. He will be just fine and he is excited to be in school and learn.
I was sad for me, that this phase of life for me, is over.
No more little pals with me at the grocery store.
No more watching disney movies in the afternoon.
No more lunchtimes sitting, eating and talking together.
I'm sure all of this will happen sometimes, but not often enough for me.
Guess what I had for lunch today, nothing!
Because my little buddy wasn't here telling me that he was hungry.
I didn't realize that time was past.
While I was sitting in my car having my little sob-fest.
A neighbor called me. She had seen me breakdown and called
to tell me that she knows how I am feeling and it will be ok.
She had sent her baby off to school full-time just last year!
It's amazing how she knew I was feeling so alone and just needed a pat on the back.
So thank you to my wonderful neighbor.
Us moms need each other because being a mom is hard.
I am happy for some things that will come out of this new phase.
I'm not completely depressed.
I cleaned the living room and it's still clean.
Things like that will be nice.
I am also starting to think about my own future instead of only the future of four little boys.
What do I want to be when I grow up?
By that I mean when my boys are all grown and gone.
(That will be an even worse day then today.)
I had better start thinking and preparing for that now,
because these next twelve years will pass even faster then the first twelve did.